Apparently I am only blogging every 3 weeks :0) I keep expecting life to slow down and it hasn’t! In the last 3 weeks we finished up soccer, had our first Parent Teacher Conference, made a weekend trip down to NM, had Connor’s 6th b-day part, put on a fondue feast for PWOC, and made a cake for a Baby Shower. It’s been a busy 3 weeks. It’s been fun though and more importantly, it’s flown by!! We are already past day 100!
I can hardly believe that Connor turned 6! I thank God for giving me such a sweet little boy. He is kind and caring. He loves to learn. He loves to say the Pledge of Allegiance. He loves to sing Praise music. He is great with Gwynn…most of the time :0) It is amazing to me how much he is really starting to understand. Most nights as Gwynn is taking her bath, Connor and I will lay in my bed and talk. One night he told me he was afraid that his daddy was going to die before he came home. WOW. What do you say?? So, I did what I felt was best and we had an honest conversation about it. I asked him why and he said, “Because daddy has a gun and guns shoot and kill people. I don’t want daddy to get shot and die.” My heart broke. Like I said, I had an honest talk with him about it. I told him that it honestly could happen. I told him that it was in God’s hands though. That none of us are promised tomorrow and when God wants us to come home to him, he will call us. And if that happens, it will be sad, but that God will take care of us. We just need to pray and ask him to keep our daddy safe and bring him home. We had a very good Parent Teacher Conference. His teacher said he is performing above grade level in every subject. He wrote an entire page about his scarecrow and his teacher said that a 2 word sentence was very good for this stage of Kindergarten. I know you’re not supposed to be boastful, but I am pretty proud of him! Then he was chosen to be the Citizen of the Quarter for his class!
Gwynn is as lively as ever. She dances her way from room to room. She says the most outrageous things. Like, “But Princesses are not supposed to go to time out!” and “Yes, that would not be appropriate.” and “God walks into our heart.” And “I don’t like YOUR tone!” She is such a little bubble of energy! She’s been really cuddly lately…which I don’t mind at all!! She’s also had some separation issues. She actually cried a few times when I left her :0( She’s been getting up between 5 and 5:30 for a few weeks now too which is really getting old, fast!!
Dustin and his 1st SGT disagreed on something. His BC agreed with him. He got moved to the night shift. I LOVED it!! We were both up at the same time! There wasn’t much going on at all so we got to talk a lot!! I love skype! It’s so amazing to me that I get to spend my day with my hubby even while he is so far away. He can sit there and watch the kids play or fight depending on how the day is going and we get to see his smiling face! Love it!! We've been making plans for a trip after he gets back too. I am really excited about it. We haven't really done anything for ourselves in a LONG time...it's been too long! I am really excited :0)
One of the challenging things about being THE adult in the house is that you have to do everything. This includes eradicating the 23 yellow jackets that had gotten comfortable in my window frames while we were away for the weekend. I have now ended the life of 33…in my house! Now, had Dustin been home I am sure he would have taken on that responsibility. He is a “weapon of mass destruction” after all ;0) Here lies the challenge though. When you’re the sole parent, you take it all on. You have to learn to be strong while also being gentle. You have to learn to be the bad cop and the good cop. You have to pay the bills, fix dinner, mow the lawn, work the screw driver, do the dishes, kill the bugs, plant the flowers…and then your hubby comes home. The challenge is to become the person you were before and give back the responsibilities you didn’t have before. It can be as challenging as taking on the new roles to begin with!
As for me, God is really working on me! I have been really convicted about negative thoughts and things coming out of my mouth. Of course it seems that when you’re convicted of something, you have lots of practice to make it right!! It has been really difficult! Especially with all of the political propaganda that is going on. I am getting so frustrated! It makes me so sad that all you hear about either side is mudslinging! Sometimes all I want to do is yell and scream and point out how illogical some things are. However, I think I’ve been pretty good at just shouting it upward! Of course God has put people in my life that give me practice in my everyday life with this lesson too. It’s a hard one, but I think it’s an important one!
I see so much sadness and anger around me too. I feel that it comes from a sense of entitlement. So many people blame everyone else for their situation instead of taking responsibility for their own actions and decisions. Then they expect to be given everything and for someone else to fix their problems for them. I have seen so much take, take, take and people not remembering that you need to give too. You can’t just take. If everyone takes, there will be nothing to give. It just makes my heart sink to know they could be so happy if they would stop focusing on themselves and move their focus upward. Oh how I wish more people knew the love and peace Christ has given to me.
One night, as Dustin was watching the kids he said, “Wow, Gwynn isn’t a toddler any more. She has changed SO much in the last 3 months.” She has too. I had this overwhelming sensation of loss and sadness. Not so much for me, but for my husband who is missing so much. God is so good and faithful though. He took me to Jeremiah 33. It talks about a desolate place where neither man nor animal will inhabit. Then it speaks of the Lord’s enduring Love and how he restores the fortunes of the land as they were before! It brought such peace to my heart. Yes, these are challenging times and occasionally it feels like I am living in a desolate land. However, God’s love endures forever and he will restore my “land” as it was before!
Bible Verse of the Day:
Jeremiah 33:11: Give thanks to the Lord Almighty, for the Lord is good, his love endures forever!
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